tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9359985760086298762024-02-20T16:19:44.887-08:00BumbleflybBumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.comBlogger10125truetag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-17031933523270305782013-06-15T21:37:00.002-07:002013-06-15T21:37:38.112-07:00Cat duy in Bastrop...is amazed by the generosity, caring spirit, and resilience shown by the people devastated by the Bastrop fires... I can't begin to imagine the loss, dread, and thoughts going through their heads. I am so grateful and blessed to be able to provide comfort, support, piece of mind, and heartfelt sorrow for the people I talk to everyday that are waiting, praying their home is still standing, while crying for friends that have lost everything, feeding firefighters, and taking in stray horses, stopping by our tent to keep us updated- looking for a hug... My God... I've never been more grateful, seen more strength, or truly cared for those I met for five minutes... Please let the fires stop.Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-28038006222798844002009-06-18T00:29:00.000-07:002009-06-18T00:40:59.279-07:00Society and JobsSo, I am a little worried. I've had hope regardless of the falling housing market, the falling job market, the potential that the United States is falling apart... but now, I'm not so sure. I know that the press and media have their own way of making things sound so much worse than it is, but to me, it seems that no one is safe from the impending fall out that every company is subject to.<br /><br />I feel blessed to have a condo that I love. A roommate that I love and is responsible. A boyfriend that takes care of me in a way otherwise not known to me in this life. And two cats, that are not just cats, but are great companions. Oh, and a best friend that as it turns out, is a distant cousin.<br /><br />I had a full time job as a teacher, which I left because I felt the need to go a different direction. Only to be preceeded by a massive teacher layoff and pay cut, because teachers don't get paid enough as it is, lets give them more students and pay them less...<br /><br />I went back to graduate school to work on my second masters in transportation planning. I have an awesome intership lined up. There is plently of work but no money...<br /><br />I have a year left in school and am somehow lucky enough to have found a reasonably permanent albeit low paying, but stress free and love, at Hallmark.<br /><br />So, the point of this rambling? I'm not sure. I feel lucky to have what I have and be at the place that I am but I am also worried about the future. I am now giving up this worry and uncertainty to God. For I trust that he will take care of me and provide for my basic needs.<br /><br />Hmm... Thats about it for nowBumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-33664078610826410282009-06-17T22:55:00.001-07:002009-06-17T22:55:33.765-07:00The Justice System fails again....<div id="articlestory"><p>OKLAHOMA CITY - A plea deal that sent an ex-convict accused of raping a 4-year-old girl to jail for only a year has prompted outrage across Oklahoma, where lawmakers are calling for the removal of the judge who approved the deal and the attorney general is investigating a new set of abuse allegations.</p> <p>Under the deal, David Harold Earls, 64, of McAlester, pleaded no contest last month to first-degree rape and forcible sodomy. Normally, the rape charge carries a sentence of between five years to life in prison, but the deal he struck with prosecutors called for 19 years of his 20-year sentence to be suspended.</p> <p>Prosecutors said they agreed to the plea bargain only because the case rested largely on the testimony of the girl, now 5, who made contradictory statements during pretrial hearings. After initially testifying about the assault, she later said she couldn't remember.</p> <p>The case has generated more outrage as new accusations have surfaced. After Earls entered his plea, an estranged relative came forward to make a new allegation of a past rape. Although the statute of limitations likely has expired, it's possible the allegations could be used in another case against Earls.</p></div>Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-67273590663700944842009-06-13T18:30:00.000-07:002009-06-13T18:34:52.562-07:003 praises and 1 complaint about the GhettoSo, today I got my hair cut and colored by one of my moms friends. She was so nice, as was everyone else in the salon as well as the workers in the stores in the same complex. My hair cut is so cute. The color and highlights are perfect, and it cost $80 for a cut, color, and highlight (which is less than half of what I would normally pay.) So, in other words, I love my hair.<br />As for the complaint... Well, I drive my car everywhere, I am not careful. I have a couple little scratches, but nothing big. But today, while I was parked in the ghetto for two hours... I get side swiped. So sad.... But I love my hair!<br /><br />PS... if you are willing to brave the ghetto and park a couple rows out... the lady that did my hair was wonderful! (and cheap)Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-35323596824828902722009-02-12T21:45:00.000-08:002009-02-12T22:29:09.582-08:00Growing UpSo, I think I am finally growing up, finally. I am now 28, I am in graduate school for the 2nd time, I have a new, soon to be roommate, a wonderful boyfriend that I trust, a great best friend, and many other wonderful friends. I'm not sure if it is because I am finally growing up or if it is because I am finally at a place where I am confident, not questionable, and or learning how to trust, but I am happy. It is odd.<br />Tauni is my best friend. I can breath one way or another and not say a word and she will understand, regardless of if we agree on the key point. We can be extravagant, over the edge, totally normal, crazy, cheap, real, or any other desire that life provides at the time. I love her to no end. Which is wonderful, as she has overtaken my need for Andy. He used to be my best friend, but he is married and we went our separate ways, and I wish him the best.<br />I have a couple other groups of friends. Highschool friends, that I realize are no longer the single most important people in my life, that I realize are on different paths, that I may not agree with, yet support because that is what you do for your oldest friends, while realizing that there is no point in being hurt since I am not their best friend because reasonably, they are not mine either. Yet if something of importance happens, they will be there without a question one way or another.<br />And my newest, younger, group of friend from Rockbrook. They are a group of young women, that are amazingly worldly, mature beyond their years, truly wonderful women, and able to take my experiences with an open mind while sharing their experiences without a doubt of validity.<br /><br />For once in my life, I am in school and not enjoying it, I may be ready to have a real job. I have a boyfriend, that if we don't see each other tonight or tomorrow, I have no doubt that he is still completely devoted to me. My parents, are becoming my friends. I can be honest, truthful, frustrated, and still know they will love me and be my friend.<br />My brother, who I realize would never be someone I would ever know in a parallel world, is the cement that keeps me who I am, the helium that lets me soar, and someone, that will always understand me in a way that no one else ever will.<br />I don't know if I am growing up, becoming myself, or finally realizing what is important, but I am happy, I'm not sure what the truly means but in my own way, as questionable as I may be of myself, I am honestly happy. I have no fears, I know that the Lord will take care of me, that my cats are angels sent to protect and give me constant love throughout the last 12 years of my life, that my mom did the best she could, my dad is the best he can be, and everyone else, including the aforementioned, did the best they could in the circumstances of the times, learned their lessons and became wonderful, well intentioned people.<br />Additionally, I no longer feel like a little girl that can not control her fate. I feel like a woman, coming into my own, that is happy, understanding, motherly (in my own way), and somehow, accepting/forgiving and able to forge great relationships with people that otherwise may never cross paths.<br />I have truly been shown the extent of real relationships. Grace, may be 65, but is wonderful and amazingly young. Angie, is doing the best she can and is a great person. Erin, I don't even know what to say. I love her, I long for our 8 hours days together, appreciate her honesty when I know what she is thinking, when she does not want to share but needs someone to love her.<br />Becky and I, have nothing in common, she is a wife and mother of three, yet I love her and she loves me and we will show up in the time of need. Kathleen, is amazing. I hope she moves to NC and is happy, she deserves it.<br />My dream is to finish school, get married, get a job out of state, move, be happy, have kids, grow in my relationship with my husband, children, and the Lord... and someday be a girlscout troop leader.<br />Yes, I think I am finally growing up.Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-68762672082301156832009-01-26T07:43:00.000-08:002009-01-26T07:54:21.848-08:00Food Allergy EnemiesSo, I am deathly allergic to all kinds of seafood. This is fun and totally safe! Below is a list of restaurants that I am permanently boycotting based on questionable sanitary practices.<br />1. Paradise Bakery- three instances, two locations, over a year and a half span... tuna in the chicken salad. If they can't keep the tuna and chicken separate, what else is commingling that shouldn't be?<br />2. Bagel Nosh- North Scottsdale Location Only (Ahwatukee location is awesome!) I ordered a chicken salad sandwich, which was free of any seafood particles, however, the person in front of me ordered a tuna melt and not only was some tuna left on the cutting board that stuck to my innocent bagel, I watched as the girl used the same knife to cut my sandwich, after I told her I was Deathly Allergic and to be careful.<br />3. Brueggers Bagels- I ordered a cinnamon sugar bagel with strawberry cream cheese, one of my all time favorites. I took my first bite while driving and happen to look down to see odd pink chunks that had just been halved as I took a bite. I openned the bagel, praying the pink things were strawberry chunks... But oh no, that would be too easy. Somehow, the cream cheese had little pieces of lox (cold salmon) in it. Even though I spit out the part that I had eatten, almost three weeks later, my stomach still feels raw.Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-43430774264618176522009-01-26T07:27:00.000-08:002009-01-26T07:42:42.535-08:00Educational Budget CutsThe state is in debt, lets cut education!!!!<br />I have two theories on educational budget cuts. A list of cuts that will be made to save money...One is what I believe is going to happen and two is what I think should happen although I know it never will.<br />Cuts- Before and afterschool homework and supplemental reading help- PAC, after school day care- Test score committees, yes, all the tests that are mandated three times a year, that decide whether or not schools receive funding, oh, those scores don't matter anymore because there is no one to input the test scores into the overall data base.- teachers already amazingly high salary is to be cut, while adding up to 50 students per classroom, as the size limit is no longer- classroom spending is gone- and this is just the beginning.<br />My theories-<br />1. Arizona is going to end up with privitized education that, surprise surprise, educates that wealthy that can afford to pay for private schools, while public schools are going to be third world where EVERY child is left behind.<br />2. Arizona needs to consolidate its school districts into three major areas. Tucson, Phoenix, and Flagstaff. This way teachers pay could be equalized, support staff would not be cut, and appoint maybe 5 superintendants and fire all the rest. Their pay would be enough to fund quite a bit of current debt. Each school could continue to run the way it is, but instead of having a high paid person in charge of a school district with three schools, four teachers could keep their jobs and provide education to children in a reasonable class size.<br />But only if I ruled the world....Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-11219303846045812082008-08-18T22:21:00.001-07:002008-08-19T22:17:56.826-07:00Speaking out about childhood molestation, not for the faint of heartSo, I am up way past my bed time. This is considering after having not a single thing to do for the last three weeks that I suddenly have two orientations tomorrow and have to wake up early. I really have nothing to say, but I am typing anyway because I like to share my random thoughts. Tonight I am thinking about the book I am reading. It is called, "The girls who went away. The hidden history of women who surrendered children for adoption in the decades before Roe vs Wade."<br />This story has hit home for me. I was not adopted, nor was anyone in my family, or anyone I really know for that matter. However, the pain, abandonment, future intimacy issues, low self esteem, and secrecy that surround this topic are all too familiar.<br />If you don't really want to know me, then stop reading now. Otherwise, I am about to share information that I am completely open about, that does not define who I am but does explain a lot of the choices and feelings I have had in my life. So, here it goes...<br />I was molested when I was 3 years old, by my step grandfather, and I remember every detail. I know, you must be thinking how can I remember something from that young? I don't know how to explain it, but I remember every detail of it. I remember the blue bedroom, the orange house with arches, the twin bed, the door slowly being opened, being told I had wet the bed and needed to be changed (which wasn't true), I remember the taste of ice cream that I made the next day with my grandmother and the smell of chlorine from swimming with my grandfather while he touched me. I had dreams about this for many years. I had no connection to my feelings and still have issues connecting with myself, let alone others. I now know that this is a survival technique. Separating oneself from their body and merly watching in order to survive.<br />It stopped when I was four and my grandparents moved to Iowa. But the damage was already done. I had gone from a loud, happy go lucky, crazy girl to a shy, quiet, girl that hid in the corner. I had no idea what had happened until I saw home videos that had been transfered from VHS to DVD and were randomly placed in a very telling order. I saw these videos and lost it. I knew something had happened. I had known since I was 19. But when I was 26, seeing those home videos put it all together. I saw first hand how I had changed from a wild crazy 3 year old, to a scared 4 year old. Seeing that evidence in front of my face made it hard to ignore.<br />Finally, when I was 26, seven years after I knew for sure and 23 years after the molestation had actually occured, I told my parents. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. I was teaching first grade at the time and was known among the teachers as someone that did a lot of CPS reports. I knew the signs and I didn't ignore them. I helped save at least six children from a life of continued abuse. This was very hard on me. I had panic attacks on a regular basis, I sabatoged any relationship I attempted to be in for fear that they would hurt me or even worse leave me. Then came the time that my two beautiful, wonderful nieces were turning three. The age at which it happened to me. At this point I could no longer keep my secret. I was no longer worried about what my family thought, what the police would say, all I knew was that I had to protect those two innocent girls from going through what I went through. And I did. I can't explain to you the feelings that go along with finally telling the truth, not having your life be a secret, and amazingly being supported by every single person in my life and family. Every single one of them said, hmm... we always knew something wasn't right, we just couldn't put our finger on it. Hmmm... no wonder we all thought he was creepy but just had no idea why.<br />I was the only girl born in my family for three generations. Everyone knew that I wasn't okay but wasn't sure why. Everyone thought my grandfather was a bad man but had no solid reason. The night I told my secret everyone in my family was there. They all went with me to the police station to report it. They all stood behind me when I wanted to go alone to the police station to call and confront him while an investigator recorded the converstation. I had been alone in my secret for so long and was so strong for myself that I didn't want any help. My family understood that about me. My dad has an identical twin brother. He was there for me. There was no question that I was telling the truth, just questions of details. He has since stopped all communication with that part of the family. My dads younger brother, sadly was put in the middle of it. My grandmother would call him to tell him to tell my dad to tell me whatever. And I felt so bad. I didn't mean to put a rif in the family for him. So one day I called him and said how sorry I was that my situation had put him in a tough place. And I was amazed at how he responded. He said, "You know what? Don't think of it for a second. I know you are telling the truth, I know he is bad man and she is a weak woman for staying with him and they have only proved this by their reaction to this whole situation. I don't regret believing you for one second because honestly I don't care to be invovled with people who would do that to you." I mean, the support was over whelming. I knew I had a special family but I had no idea to the extent that they would go to support me.<br />A year later, I found a lump in my breast. At 27, this usually isn't too big of an issue. Luckily my mom works in the industry and I had an extremely fast set of 3 ultra sounds, a mamogram, and scheduled biopsy. With all this going on, it was important for me to know my family history. My moms side was easy to know. My dads side on the other hand was more difficult. My dad and my stepmom offered to call and get the medical history from the side of the family that had threatened to kill me the previous year due to my accusations. But it was something I had to do on my own. I had to be strong for myself and find out. Sadly, my grandmother would not take a call from me. However, I understood. I left her a message telling her I needed family medical history. I had a lump in my breast and needed to know if I had a family history on that side, especially since I tend to take after my dads side of the family. And as a side note, the grandfather that molested me was not my dads real dad, he is great. It was my dads step dad. However, a day after I left a message pleading for medical information my grandmother did contact my uncle to contact my dad to tell me that we had no family history that she was aware of. Although, I am so sad that she couldn't put her feelings about my accusations aside, due to the fact that I know she was aware of what was going on in her house, that she at least made the effort to get me the information I needed. Luckily my tests were not conclusive of any major issues. However, I do have to return to retest in a year to make sure.<br />In all of this, I learned that people don't always choose their loyalties correctly, that people can surprise you when they actually show up in your time of need when you thought they didn't care, and the unending bond between a father and a daughter, a sister and brother, and mother and father. It is also amazing how when you begin to tell your story, how others come forward to tell you their experience. It is so upsetting to find out how many of my friends went through the same thing and still are unable to come out to their family out of fear of rejection yet take my revelation as an open invitation to share their own history knowing full well I will help and support them in any way they need.<br />I knew for 7 years before I told. People often ask me why I waited so long to speak up. Honestly, I have a great dad, brother, uncles, and cousins who would kill for me without an explaination. But I knew at that time, I needed these men to protect me and be there for me on a daily basis. I wasn't ready for justice if that meant any of them would go to jail for protecting me. Now, years later, they have all grown up a bit. They would all kill for me if I said the word. But they also understand that I need them with me more than I need them to avenge my perpatrator. They also know that if anyone is going to get to take their hurt and anger out on my grandfather, it is going to be me, hands down, with them standing behind me regardless, that I am the only one that could fully express my hurt and anger appropriately.<br />I have been through counseling. Which helped me a lot. I don't try to control things. I don't have a sick stomach on a daily basis anymore, and I finally was able to attend my first family holiday without worrying that he would show up.<br />I have freed myself a great deal with the admission of this information. I have helped countless children with my drive to protect them since I was too young to protect myself. My cousin has thanked me more than once for saving his daughter from ever being around that man, as he would have easily agreed to let my grandmother spend time with his daughter. But due to my openness, she won't get to spend a single day with her and she will hopefully be protected from the horrible things I went through for only a year, at a very young age, that happened to shape the rest of my life. He doesn't deserve that power. I am taking that power back, slowly. I still feel so damaged and scared that I don't know how to connect with another human, male or female. I am trying so hard. I deserve to live past this. I've tried to forgive him and sometimes I think that I have, but in all honesty, I don't think he deserves it. I think he deserves to be raped and molested as he did to me. I think he deserves to spend the rest of his life in fear that I will come at him with more. But, I really don't want to focus on the bad things that happen. I want to be thankful for the drive to succeed I have learned to live with. I am thankful for the unconditional support I have received from my family and friends.<br />I hope someone will read this who hasn't yet found their voice. It will only work when you are ready to share your own experience. If you are reading this as a molested adult child, feel free to contact me, if you are just a random person, please don't feel sorry for me. Be happy that I have come out the strong person I am who is willing to put herself on the line to help others that don't know how to ask. Be glad that I had unconditional support during the entire situation.<br />I am currently trying to figure out where to go from here. I don't want anything from him or his family, which is why I have not given identities. This is about me and my survival, not him and his crime. He doesn't deserve a spot light like that.<br />Thank you so much for reading this long long rant. I feel better just posting this and hoping it finds its way onto the computer of someone who needs to talk, advice on speaking out, or has the need for me to speak out on behalf of them. This is not the last you will hear about this. I am currently writing my life story and how my molestation guided a large part of my life and how my healing has been amazing.<br />I thank you once again. You were wonderful to continue to read this, even as it got super long. I hope I didn't upset anyone, I mean no harm. Only peace, sharing, and hope comes from this experience. After all, this experience is what brought me to Jesus as my savior and continues to show me that I am not in this alone. I have Jesus on my side which is more than enough. This happened to me for a reason. I am not bitter. I am happy to be a strong enough person to be open enough to put myself out there in hopes that someone who isn't sure they are strong enough to contact me for advice. I am not a therapist, I am a first grade teacher, I am a mama bear, I love and care for others unconditionally, I accept many faults in others knowing they have shaped who they are today, I am understanding, I listen, I won't try to get you to believe what I believe, however, I will try, listen, and help anyone who needs it. I know saying that my molestation was a blessing may sound out of place. But if my experience can help others, or save others from experiencing what I have, I feel more than blessed to know how to stand up for myself, for your children, and for you.<br />Thank you for reading.Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-4006429296668300662008-08-06T06:17:00.000-07:002008-08-06T06:33:28.615-07:00What I am looking for...This is what I am looking for in a potential life partner.<br /><br />I want someone that will respect and protect me from any kind of harm.<br />I want someone that thinks I am the standard of beauty.<br />I want someone who wants to be friends first. Because in all honesty, who wants to be with someone they wouldn't hang out with as friends.<br />I want someone that wants to be better in himself, so I can be better in myself, for each other.<br />I want a true partner. Someone you can rely on day in and day out and not worry what they might be doing if they don't answer there phone right away. Someone that understands that relationships are not 50/50. Sometimes they are 100/0 or 0/100 and are will to go that far if need be.<br />I want someone that isn't allergic to my cats. Someone that can actually like my cats. I have had them for 12 years, longer than any guy has been around. And I know that I can not truly care for someone that is indifferent to or doesn't like my cats.<br />I want someone that isn't afraid to tell people we are together. That even if I am not around, everyone knows that he is with me and that I am with him. Someone that will hold my hand in public, give me little kisses, and tells his family about me.<br />I want someone that is there unconditionally. Pretty and all made up, or sick on the couch making me peppermint tea. Knowing full well that I will do the same for him.<br />I want someone that does not smoke, anything, do drugs, or drink to an excess. Drinking is fine, but there is a point when it becomes antisocial.<br />I want someone that likes to go out to dance, with me. That clubbing isn't a weekend mandatory and if it is an option, there is no question that he would be taking me with.<br />I want someone that, even if he is not a Christian, to either be respectful and or curious to at least understand what I believe. I'm not trying to change anyone but would like to be understood on more than one level. In which case, I am open to learn that part of him.<br />I want someone that won't try to have sex with me on the first date. The answer will be no. This goes back to my first desire, to be protected and respected.<br />I want someone that I can talk to everyday, not because it is a requirement but because we really just want to check in and see how the other one is doing.<br />Above all else, I want someone that is ready to love me and only me. Someone that understands that yes, his mother and sister are important but if we are to create our own family someday, I need to be their one and only true love in that sense.<br />Does this sound unattainable? I don't think it is too much to ask. I think I am asking for a decent human partner that can't live without me and that I can't live without. Who are desperately attracted to eachother and want to be partners in life. Us against the world. Is that so hard?Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-935998576008629876.post-78383168504830562642008-07-31T10:14:00.000-07:002008-08-16T16:39:41.111-07:00Working with ChildrenSo. I have been a teacher for five years. I recently spent my summer at a camp as the Jr. Line Head. I am home now due to grandparent illnesses. However, I have learned that working with kids just is not worth it. I can try and try and try and do everything the best way I can and someone will always question me. Someone will always try and change things to their way because I don't know what I am doing and my experience isn't valid. People who work with children are grossly underpaid, treated like second class citizens, and can do no right. With all the requirements to be a teacher and the continued low end pay scale, I am surprised that there are any teachers at all. Did you know that with a Masters Degree, after taxes, a teachers pay is measured on the poverty scale? How can teachers live unless they have someone else supporting them? All the while, getting paid nothing, with parents not teaching their kids to respect you, while teachers are doing their absolute best to change the world one child at a time, and what do they get? A whole lot of crap.<br />I am so happy to have left the education field. It is sad, because I love kids. I love working with them, making them smile, holding them while they cry, and teaching them. It is all amazing and rewarding. But if I can't pay my bills, which I am in no debt, just my living expenses, it's too much to ask.<br />I don't want to get into the realm of politics, but until a former educator is in charge of educational funding, this country is going to lose all its' educators some day. Teachers do picket now. They do it before and after school. They continue to teach during the day. Now that shows class. How a person can stand up for their rights and try to get fair compensation during their own free time, and still do the job because it's not the kids fault.<br />I am so distraut on this subject at the moment. I decided in January I was going to leave the field. It was the best choice of my life. While I am in graduate school, I plan to sub at my old school. I want to be able to see the kids grow without all the added stress put on teachers to; be on a committee, tutor after school, update a class web page daily, show an interest and go play with the kids at lunch (because really what else can you do with a whole 25 minutes?), test all your kids four times a year, while still giving a quality education to those you are not testing, while making them be quiet, putting a bandaid on a cut finger, updating yourself on emails/ changes to the schedule, all while not having enough time to think, grade papers, use the rest room, or imput grades.<br />But we get three months off. Oh really? I'd like to find a teacher that doesn't work summer school, makes enough money during the year to make a summer vacation feasible, that isn't waiting for her first paycheck back to pay late bills, that doesn't babysit on the side, among other random side jobs to make ends meet, let alone have time for a social life, a boyfriend, or a family.<br />I'm going to stop now because I have to get ready to go to lunch. But whatever. I'm over it.Bumbleflybhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17492519244547031126noreply@blogger.com0