Growing Up

So, I think I am finally growing up, finally. I am now 28, I am in graduate school for the 2nd time, I have a new, soon to be roommate, a wonderful boyfriend that I trust, a great best friend, and many other wonderful friends. I'm not sure if it is because I am finally growing up or if it is because I am finally at a place where I am confident, not questionable, and or learning how to trust, but I am happy. It is odd.
Tauni is my best friend. I can breath one way or another and not say a word and she will understand, regardless of if we agree on the key point. We can be extravagant, over the edge, totally normal, crazy, cheap, real, or any other desire that life provides at the time. I love her to no end. Which is wonderful, as she has overtaken my need for Andy. He used to be my best friend, but he is married and we went our separate ways, and I wish him the best.
I have a couple other groups of friends. Highschool friends, that I realize are no longer the single most important people in my life, that I realize are on different paths, that I may not agree with, yet support because that is what you do for your oldest friends, while realizing that there is no point in being hurt since I am not their best friend because reasonably, they are not mine either. Yet if something of importance happens, they will be there without a question one way or another.
And my newest, younger, group of friend from Rockbrook. They are a group of young women, that are amazingly worldly, mature beyond their years, truly wonderful women, and able to take my experiences with an open mind while sharing their experiences without a doubt of validity.

For once in my life, I am in school and not enjoying it, I may be ready to have a real job. I have a boyfriend, that if we don't see each other tonight or tomorrow, I have no doubt that he is still completely devoted to me. My parents, are becoming my friends. I can be honest, truthful, frustrated, and still know they will love me and be my friend.
My brother, who I realize would never be someone I would ever know in a parallel world, is the cement that keeps me who I am, the helium that lets me soar, and someone, that will always understand me in a way that no one else ever will.
I don't know if I am growing up, becoming myself, or finally realizing what is important, but I am happy, I'm not sure what the truly means but in my own way, as questionable as I may be of myself, I am honestly happy. I have no fears, I know that the Lord will take care of me, that my cats are angels sent to protect and give me constant love throughout the last 12 years of my life, that my mom did the best she could, my dad is the best he can be, and everyone else, including the aforementioned, did the best they could in the circumstances of the times, learned their lessons and became wonderful, well intentioned people.
Additionally, I no longer feel like a little girl that can not control her fate. I feel like a woman, coming into my own, that is happy, understanding, motherly (in my own way), and somehow, accepting/forgiving and able to forge great relationships with people that otherwise may never cross paths.
I have truly been shown the extent of real relationships. Grace, may be 65, but is wonderful and amazingly young. Angie, is doing the best she can and is a great person. Erin, I don't even know what to say. I love her, I long for our 8 hours days together, appreciate her honesty when I know what she is thinking, when she does not want to share but needs someone to love her.
Becky and I, have nothing in common, she is a wife and mother of three, yet I love her and she loves me and we will show up in the time of need. Kathleen, is amazing. I hope she moves to NC and is happy, she deserves it.
My dream is to finish school, get married, get a job out of state, move, be happy, have kids, grow in my relationship with my husband, children, and the Lord... and someday be a girlscout troop leader.
Yes, I think I am finally growing up.